The 2006 VMAs

Okay, you know the MTV Video Music Awards are LAME when my only comments are these:

- The highlight of my night was watching the little girl from the movie Little Miss Sunshine do the running man on stage with Fergie (although, apparently this child needs to hit a gym and a school because she could neither open the envelope nor read what was inside).

- Jessica Simpson is rumored to be going back on a diet (hanging with John Mayer has obviously introduced her to the phenomenon known as 'The Munchies')

- The crew from Jackass were the only group of people that seemed alive (I didn't say funny, just alive)

- Kurt Loder, with his usual distaste for most people he interviews, repeatedly introduced people as 'Amy Lee and band member' or 'Jack White and band members.' Kurt, your job is to stand there and talk to people on camera. Try getting their names. It's kind of like, your job.

My suggestions for next years show? I want all the rockers and all the rappers to show up wearing the exact same suit and then seat them in two sets of bleachers on stage, grouped by genre. Then I want Kurt Loder to come out and try and name them all.